Life after raising children—or even after decades in a career—is not the end of the story. It’s the beginning of a new chapter. This blog was created for middle-agers who find themselves standing at a crossroads: the kids are grown, the career may be shifting, and the question quietly arises—what’s next?
My name is Toni, and I am 57 years old. I am a proud mother of six, and my life’s work has stretched across academia, ministry, and the nonprofit world. I have spent decades pouring myself into others—teaching, leading, nurturing, and serving. On paper, it sounds full, rich, and meaningful. And in many ways, it has been. But behind the degrees, the titles, and the many hats I’ve worn, there have been seasons when I’ve wrestled with something many women quietly endure: depression and the slow fading of my own sense of self.
A few months ago, I sat at my kitchen table with a cup of coffee that had gone cold. I remember staring out the window, watching the same cars pass by, the same tree swaying in the breeze, and thinking: Nothing in my life is moving.
That’s what being stuck feels like. The outside world keeps going, but inside, you feel frozen. Maybe for you it shows up in your career—you’re good at what you do, but it doesn’t excite you anymore. Maybe it’s in relationships—same arguments, same cycles, same distance. Or maybe it’s that dull ache of routine, like you’re living the same day on repeat.
Both women and men carry this weight differently, but the ache is the same. And if that’s where you are right now, I want you to hear this: stuck doesn’t mean broken. It just means something in your life is asking for attention.
For me, the turning point wasn’t dramatic. It was a small step. I wrote down one sentence: “I don’t want to feel like this a year from now.” That became my compass. From there, I:
Took a walk every morning to clear my mind.
Called a friend and told the truth instead of saying, “I’m fine.”
Gave myself permission to dream about what I really wanted, without shutting it down with “That’s impossible.”
None of those things solved everything overnight. But they broke the stillness. Movement—any movement—reminds us we aren’t stuck forever.
Acknowledge it. Pretending you’re fine only keeps you in place. Say it out loud: “I feel stuck.”
Ask better questions. Instead of “Why is this happening to me?” try “What is this season trying to teach me?”
Change one small thing. Rearrange your workspace, start journaling, or set a new boundary. Even a tiny shift can spark momentum.
Invite others in. Sometimes we need fresh eyes on our situation. Don’t be afraid to ask for perspective.
Practice grace. Being stuck isn’t failure. It’s a pause, a chance to reset.
If today feels heavy, breathe. You don’t have to leap forward with a five-year plan. You just need one step, one action, one spark.
✨ Question for you: What’s one small thing you could do this week to remind yourself that you’re not stuck forever?
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